Jz woke up..still dazing at the ceiling..the chill weather outside made me want to continue my sleep..but to bad today is jz my first afternoon shift.im feeling sick n tired of work..everyday im dragging my feet to work,praying for the best of rstr to survive till i tap out my PS card..everyday browse the net for a new job..dad is totally unhappy abt dat..everything in my life seems like it fading away..bit by bit..haiz!career sux,bf drifting away,n no enjoyment in life anymore..God,is dis just one of yr test again for the weakest creature of all mankind?i miss sch terribly already..the waking up late,going hm early,the cabot-class,the taiti session..oh my!my lyf was almost perfect n i blew it away..yah..almost but not picture perfect..i cn go all the way back wen im still w my happy family,still in one piece..haiz!so much had changed!i wonder if i ever gt married n cn build a happy family myself or aint..if only Mama is here..guessed i miss her damn much!im sorry fer being a bad gal mama..cz im jz a normal one who cant resist temps..but my life wud be much,much better with u around..if only i cud turn back time..but i dun blame God for wad had happened,of cz,who am i to do tt,cz i noe God loves mama more!mama is the prettiest lady n the most wonderful thing dat had happened to me.im thankful to God for that,lastly,hope God take really good care of her up there,I LOVE YOU MAMA,JUBAIDAH BINTE HOSSAIN.Al-Fatehah.